So I finally got my first question. For those of you who haven’t checked the looking to the Skyye section on the website, I recently changed the style for asking questions to just leaving a comment in the section. This allowed people to be completely anonymous. Well I guess it worked cause here is my first question:
hi, im a girl and im thinking i might lose my virginity soon, and i have some questions to ask. I dont know how much u can help me. but i want to know how much does it hurt? and how long will it hurt for? also i have some other questions that will prolly be easier to answer. how do u learn to trust someone? and what are some good conversation starters when ure dating someone shy and not talkive?
veryconfused
Well veryconfused, when I first read your question I knew that I couldn’t give you a full answer about the pain question for your first time. As a result I asked some of my close female friends and this is what they had to say. There are many factors that can affect/alter the amount of pain, if any, that will be felt on the female’s behalf during her first time. The general census is that it will hurt the first time you have sex and will probably still hurt a little bit the next day. However the amount of pain also depends on the woman and situation. I have known some women to not feel any pain while others do. As for the situation, friends of mine have found it to hurt less if they feel truly comfortable or safe with the guy, if they feel it is the right moment, or if they don’t feel rushed. I am afraid that is all I can say to you about that. If there are female readers feel free to leave a comment for veryconfused.
Learning to trust someone is not something I can tell you how to do and you just do it. I could give you all the advice and it still could not do you any good but I will try anyway. First of all, if you are just starting to date someone start by giving them the benefit of the doubt. You have to be willing to let them in, even if just a little. Hopefully they will start to show you at the same time that you can trust them. It just happens. You will slowly notice that you stop asking yourself what he is up to or wondering if he is with another woman. It also helps to know how the person feels about you. It can comfort you during times when you are questioning if they are going to leave you. I hope that helps.
As for conversation starters its always a good idea to do the whole 21 question game. Ask questions like what his favourite band is, favourite food, most dangerous thing he has done, etc. Get to know him better. This will not only help you later on during the relationship for gift ideas or what to do on nights out but it will give you guys things to talk about. Make sure to keep your mind open. A lot of times the best conversations happen by jumping from topic to topic without even realizing it. Be random as well. The random suggestion tends to work really well when is just as random, naturally. If you have a hard time just coming up with random questions, cause lets face it we all do, I suggest looking up a book called “Book of 200 Random Questions and Facts”. I got this book from an ex as a joke and I have used it from time to time when I can’t really think of anything to talk about with friends or lovers.
Well I hope this helped and feel free to let me know if you want more information or clarification. Also, to all the readers of my blog, if you feel you can add on to what I said or have other suggestions for veryconfused, feel free to leave your comments. Thank you for your question veryconfused.
Skyye
Love is everywhere, all you have to do is look
